Day Twelve

I'm thinking that this liquid diet is kind of like a boot camp for my stomach, preparing it for what's to come.

Also, it takes two weeks to change a habit so I'm learning when I'm anxious or bored to drink some water instead of mindlessly shoving food in my face.

It's weird that I don't really feel hungry doing this, not that I wouldn't love a cheeseburger and fries right now. But that's what got me into trouble...eating without needing to.

I can't wait until I have my new little tiny pouch that will not allow me to eat too much at a time. I will learn to savor the flavor and chew slowly and really enjoy each bite.

I've observed over this time how much eating is such a part of everything I do. Social events always involve food. When I go out shopping I would always stop for a bite somewhere or get a cookie...or both. Movies meant having popcorn and soda. So much of this was mindless eating, dealing with boredom or anxiety and habit.

It's strange now to go to a movie without popcorn. I do smuggle in a protein shake however if it's near a mealtime.  My last shopping forays felt different not stopping for a snack or getting some sugary treat and soda while running from one place to another.

So much of this was to "treat myself" or at least that's the garbage I told myself. I'm getting much better at asking myself if I'm really hungry or am I thirsty or bored.

Increasing my depression/anxiety meds may be helping with this as well, so it was a nice switch up.  Now I think more about when I need to eat (or drink as the case may be right now) and not when can I eat again.

It feels good to eat to live and not live to eat for a change. This relationship is completing changing my relationship to food.